This Personal Reality of ours…
Jan 24th
While Andrew spent his time merging our blogs I spent my time working out how many votes the UK political parties would get based purely on twitter followers. Suffice to say it wasnt a happy outcome. But this blog is! Welcome to our joint world of crazyness coming at you sometimes from both sides of the pond, sometimes from just one.
Nokia’s Calling
Dec 15th
Seemingly my tiny knowledge of the Finnish language has finally paid off with an In to Nokia’s Business Systems team.. Though the manager’s English… I don’t quite get it.. But Whatev’s Fingers crossed, they like what I can give them.
How to create a militant pedestrian
May 11th
Dear Taxi Drivers,
It has come to my attention you are not used to militant pedestrians; to replicate said militant pedestrianism on your own time please follow the following steps.
- Notice the pedestrian at a pedestrian crosswalk demarcated by signs, the hatched crosswalk, and its presence at an obvious intersection.
- Have said pedestrian possess ghetto pizza, and of the kind that is not of their typical choice.
- Continue at full speed, notably above the posted speed limit, and cut the pedestrian off, knowing full well said pedestrian has the right of way at any such crosswalk.
- Have the pedestrian throw their pizza onto the taxi’s windshield as the taxi speeds by.
It is understandable that vigilantism within certain circumstances is frowned upon, yet in this particular instance there was no other method of expressing displeasure at, or noting the infraction in any meaningful way, the taxi driver’s inability to heed to pedestrian right of way. The taxi’s number or company could not be descerned at 70 kilometres per hour; the police, if called, would place any such report on their nuisance call list; and regardless of the outcome of any complaint to be made, the taxi driver would miss the immediate consequence to their inability to heed traffic law.
Thus: pizza on windshield of taxi.
Apartment Hunting in Vancouver
May 10th
To all those trying to find an apartment in Vancouver: be prepared to be hunting for a while. I’ve been looking for an apartment in some capacity since January, and I’ve yet to find one. Seriously. And it’s not like I’ve got unreasonable demands such as granite counter tops, stainless steel appliances, and a whirlpool tub with separate stand-up shower all for under $1000.
Nope, all I’m asking for is an apartment with a living room, a bedroom, a bathroom, a kitchen, decent flooring, clean walls (I can paint out of my own pocket), natural lighting, unobstructed 7 foot minimum ceilings, and a landlord who understands the Residential Tenancy Act. (Though I’d like to point out that I had an apartment — yet I lost it because the person whom I was depending on to be my reference chose not to answer the phone because it was a “weird number” and thus made me lose the place of my dreams — remains to be another post regarding mobile etiquette.)
Ideally this place is close to transit, and within the Lower Lonsdale, Main Street, Commercial Drive, or Burnaby Heights neighbourhoods.
I think over the next few days I’ll post some ridiculous stories about the hell I’ve gone through to find an apartment in Vancouver, and some of the incredibly weird demands and requests I’ve received from landlords prior to renting/viewing.
Author protests ban over phrase ‘generous bazoongas’
Nov 19th
This article amuses the hell out of me. Apparently people believe that censorship is the method of curtailing offensive language in the class room, and we’re talking mundane offensive language. “Bazoongas” doesn’t really come across as crude enough to warrant censorship, let alone when you involve a cohort of grades four to six. I guarantee you, they already know words that would make the Pope blanche.
I would like to illuminate you to my first teacher at Sir Freddie B’s method of dealing with offensive language. Instead of making the vulgar anathema, the source and history of the statement is explained. Sometimes when people understand the reasons why the word is truly offensive, maybe they would remove the pejorative term from their vocabulary.
